W X Y Z

So i was told that my almost 60 year old uncle is getting married to a 30 year old woman, bear in mind he is already married, has 5 kids, and is a grandaddy to two ugly assed grand children

when i first heard of this i got upset, maybe indignant, but then i sat there thinking about it and i wanted to smack myself senseless! wat the hell is wrong with me?

i dont believe that you can get all that you need as a person from just one partner, i believe that if you choose to stick with one person then you must be willing to sacrifice a whole lot of things , to derail your dreams of the perfect forever after with that special unique person…

its not realistic, you can find some of what you need with x, but if you want this this and that maybe you need to start looking for w, y and z too

its too pressurizing to demand the 100% satisfaction from the one partner because that partner has his/her needs, wants and wishes, if you are solely focusing on getting to your 100% you can be damned sure that he/she arnt even close to their 50%, u know?

i used to believe in finding your prince and living the idyllic life in your la la land, but not anymore, i cant be someones 100% so why expect them to be mine? to me thats the only way to sustain a relationship, you get the emotional crap from W, get the lust crap from X, get the stimulating conversation from Y and get the silly crazy assed fun from Z…

why why why make poor misguided X bare the brunt of not being able to make u insanely happy and complete? its not humanly possible!

so the way i see it is either:

• latch on to X and make him responsible for your happiness and therefore fucking kill him, or be prepared to be responsible for his happiness and sacrifice and compromise alot
• or just have the W X Y Z network! and know that they too will have their W X Y Z, mo you have your little orgy and he/she is just waiting for you to come back!

GET SMART BITCHES

i love you all, the hot guy i met on thursday waaaaaaaay more than all the others (thats for a different post)

my tiny cavemen…

there things at work that make all the bullshit worth while

one of those things are the apprentice trainees, as i’ve mentioned before, they come in as tiny cavemen but then through their training program and our tutalige (is that a word) they turn out to be great-ish young men..

they change…

we move from not looking at me as nothing but a woman to them seeing me as their big sister, their boss, their mentor and their mom at times (i know bitches!)

i see this in the way we interact, the way we deal with things and i think that it really does stem from their final awareness that deep down inside i care about the success and achievement of each and everyone of them, their success is ultimatly mine…

at first this was a job, that pays well, then as i moved up a rung in the ladder and as my responsibilities intensified i started truelly believing in training and development, our biggest asset in the company is in fact our human energy and without it the ship will most definitly sink

it gives me great pride and joy when i see them finish their two years of training and move on to their jobs and then come back as employees delivering a service to our center, it truely is gratifying! this is my third apprentice group and i could not be more happier with the guys

they’ve had their ups and downs, i’ve given them lectures, warning letters and suspension letters even and all that it served to do is bring us closer together…

i am filled with pride for them , they are really inspirational…

so here’s to my tiny cavemen…

*click* you!

okay so im done with my tasks for the day and i decide to blog hop and check out the face book crap etc etc and i couldnt help but notice something thats been sitting among the cob webs at the back of my mind which is peoples obsession with taking photographs…

i understand if photography is your hobby like Swair for example, or if you’re trying to create a new media-centric world like Ammaro, but i dont understand why people are taking pictures of their food, then their pets, then their offices, then the menu at the restaurant they were in , then the road sign, then their friends, then the people sitting at some random table, then their lips, then their shama, then their lock of random hair, then their boob, then their chest, or the graffiti, or posing for pictures next to god knows what! or hey wow we just finished this course lets take a picture *click*

i really dnt get it

what are they trying to do?

i hate taking pictures! i really do, i rarely do! and when i do i scrutinize it to hell, play around with it till im happy with it, then more often than not delete it…

i dont need to preserve memories they’ll only turn out to be painful ones at the end…

i dont need to be reminded of moments that no longer exist or will ever reoccur

its excessive and its asinine and IT JUST NEEDS TO STOP

and its a lesser evil when im exposed to this online via blogging and facebook because lets face it it is my choice to look at them, but what sucks ass is when x sits next to u and goes did i show u blah blah blah

and hands over the camera and ur sitting there like the grinch that stole christmass just flicking along hoping the streams of stupid ass captured moments would end but they never do! because the minute youre done fake smiling your way out of this some other person repeats the cycle

*screams*

over and over and over and over and over again!

uffff shofaw 3ad ana atkahrab lama akoon 7ool hal insaan! mo 9ij! shi6anat 3yoona tithba7ni!!

my god! okay i will not discuss this because then this will get too lewd too soon!

okay so this woman who works for me is a fucking nag, shes unbelievable! she is always stressed , stressing herself unnecessarily and then decides that since she is trying to be transparent with me, that she has to tell me EVERYTHING, i’ve heard her complaints and bitching sessions a million times and i really am tired of it

i sit there like a zombie, my eyes popping out of their sockets just for the hell of it! why cant she just SHUT THE FUCK UP!

you know i used to listen in silence but i am unable to do even that! now i actually cut her short when she is harping! i tell her to relax. yesterday i told her that if i see her crying at work again i will squirt water on her face! because enough is enough!!

and shes at least a 50-something old hag, so shes not even a baby! shes been doing this same job for the past 8 years so its not like shes having to battle change!

MY GOD!!! *sobs*

BASS BASS BASSSSSSSSSSS

BASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS *sobbing*

i love u all, i love my bitch more than all the others

@@ i want…

okay so i was browsing around neimus marcus website thing and im in love with these, the clutches are weird assed but i love them none the less…

 cutenessssss

 weird cutenessss

 

seriously weird but i LOVE it *licks the fish*

 you know you can never have too many red shoes

 i dnt know why i love these..

c’est tout!

now let me go back to sleep, i’ll post a genuine post later after i have my tea…

 

Back to old old “habits”

what are you doing?

Reading the newspaper

can i ag3ad agraa ma3ak, yamik!

eeeeeeeeee bas igray ib hodo2

oo laish mara7 akoon hadya oo ana agraaa, oo laish il hodo2 i7na wain ga3deen?

in my room

inzain ya3ni qa9dik ana moz3iga

eeeeeeeeeeeeeee

MALAT 3ALAIK! inzain can i kiss u ib hodo2 winta ga3id tigra il jareeda?

loooooooool ee 7ayati

tara i love u ana

i love u too

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaai a7iba!!!!! that one conversation made my day…

yama 7awalt il firag oo magowait, gelt abee ansaak lakin manisait, ma3a9ani galby ib 3omrah wilakin il akeed ini ana ili mashtahait…

i dnt know when this dysfunction will ever end, but i always end up being with him…

i love u all, him more than all the others

a7ib da wila da??

i love him so much

i am totally enamored with him, everything he does is absolutly heaven for me, every smile, every everything

but i cant have him, i dnt know if i want to have him, but i do know i want to do stuff to him and with him

its very much a mix of lust and love, a heady mix, it makes me giddy, dizzy, giggly, dilarious

my god i love him soooooooo fucking much!!

but then im uhh…

you know funny enough the song that springs to my mind is this…

hehehehhehe KAIFI…

life is good

oh and btw im in Saudi Arabia for the two days and im undecided abt my feelings but I NEED SHEESHA, walla ya sheesha ya fag il mohim smoke uffffffffffffffff

i love u all, some more than others

YOU ARE FIRED!!

omg omg omg! OH MY GOD! OMGGGG hehehe omg

i just came back from my first ever “YOU ARE FIRED” meeting

youmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

shit i wanted to giggle i really did but ista7ait lana 3aib wtf! be professional damn it

:s

my boss can get very scary…

AND HEY! I DIDNT GET FIRED! THIS GIRL WE WORK WITH GOT FIRED! I WAS A WITNESS TO THE FIRING!!

A new begining…

Good Morning ya hala eshloonkum sha5barkum!

my god my face is about to explode its so mintifi555555555 lana i dnt know il noom mo rathy iyroo7! uffff

hey take a look around :p its all gone!!  yes yes yesssssss kilaaaaaaaaa deleted!

why???

well i am a reflective person, A LOT, so going back and reading stuff, thinking of things i did etc etc is part of my nature and thats what i did yesterday, read a lot of my old posts and i wasnt happy!

i hated most of it! some of it reminded me of people i’d rather forget, feelings i’d rather deny, and pain i’d rather suppress so i was faced with these different action plans

• delete my blog and just slink of silently
• delete my blog, create a new one and start blogging
• delete all my posts and start a new??

well we all know what i chose! and im soooo happyyyyyyyy *SIGH OF RELIEF*

so let me re-introduce myself…

Hi I’m Shwaish (thats what they iydal3ooni since i was a tinyyyy baby) and im an Everything-holic

i love you all, some more than others